We’re all perverts to a degree. It’s just a matter of how much. Or how much we are willing to admit. Or what we consider perversion. Again, kinkiness is in the eye of the beholder. As far as perversion is concerned, I take the fifth.
The Top Ten Signs That You’re A Pervert
1. Marcus - When saying goodbye, you say things like, “See Yours!”, “Vagi-now!”, “Babay-again!” and “Titi You Later!”
2. Michael Agustin - Back in high school, I was taking a bath when my dad knocked on the door and said, “Anak, kakain na tayo! Mamaya mo na ulit laruin yan.” Takes 1 to know 1. My dad is a pervert too.
3. SPY Shadow - Sila yung balik ng balik sa entrance ng building para makapkapan ulit ni Manong guard. At galit pa kung walang malisya ang kapkap nila.
4. Bongoloid - You’re a pervert if all the pages of your girly magazines are sticking to each other.
5. Jose de vengenge - For girl perverts. Pag nakitulog sa inyo ang hot sexy crush mo, you make him wear your 13-yr-old brother’s butas-butas na shorts para maliit na sa kanya, at may makikita ka pa.
6. Jessie - I find it sexy when I see two dogs sniffing butts.
7. Enigmatic - I’m a straight guy, but when I’m at the beach, I admire men’s buff bodies. I can’t explain it, but I’m also drawn to men’s nipples.
8. Ateh ko - Whenever I see my crush at work, we hug each other. I love it especially wen he hugs me so tight and my breasts are pressed against his sexy chest. Nakakailang, pero I like it.
9. No name - Our admin secretary, around 38 years old, sometimes wears high-heeled shoes that has a reflective metal plate in the toe area. I call it her “pasilip” shoes.
10. Triggerhappy - You’re a pervert kung after sex, ihi na nga lang ang pahinga, sisilipan mo pa.
11. Lebroni - When you talk like Chico and think like Delamar.
12. Mr. Perk - If your favorite part of a haircut is the rinsing because someone’s touching your hair and it gives you a different sensation.
13. RC N CESS - This topic is very tempting. I’m in a bus going to Cavite. And just about now, girls in PE uniforms just boarded.
14. Bottom Dweller - Jon, a friend of mine, has a decade’s worth of Avon underwear brochures.
15. Maximo - Pag lagi kang pumupunta sa funeral parlor para tingnan yung mga ine-embalsamong mga hubo’t hubad na bangkay.
16. Tim - I have fantasies of our female boss sexually harassing me. She’s fun, hot and my age. So if she’s listening right now, “Ma’am, pramis…hindi ako papalag.”
17. Espeks - Kung kembot pa lang ng balakang ng girl, eh umiilaw na ang bombilya mo.
18. Yalem - My brother is certified pervert. Whenever I open my personal pc, he puts wallpaper of nude girls. Sa history naman ng websites, lahat porn sites and when I use the keyboard, its always sticky.
19. Boobsie 36″ - I’m a female with a size D cup bra. I really couldn’t believe I could suck my own nipples.
20. Jose de vengenge - If you know all the top porn sites like youporn, xtube, xlive & iyotube.
21. Mr. Hard-Rock Abs - My perversion is to look at guys’ armpits wherever, whenever.
22. Espeks - I have a friend who rides the FX and uses his elbow as his main weapon to feel the hot girl beside her.
23. Muldr’s Luvr - I think I’m a perv because I always fantasize about doing “it” w/ my young, tall, fresh and good-looking subordinate who has flawless skin and smells good even when he’s sweating. Oops, too much info…sorry.
24. KiD BuKid - Perverts’ rooms smell like Clorox!
Jose de vengenge - Guys please don’t judge me for admitting this ah. I get excited when I read/hear rape stories in the news especially if they’re detailed.
25. SUPAH GODDESS - Whenever I see the armpits of John Lloyd Cruz, Jake Cuenca and Richard Gutierrez, oh goodness, I start to have erotic images of them.
26. McMaki - If you try to stand close to people so you can sniff how they smell.
27. Dox - I can’t eat a banana or sausage without choking at some point.
28. Purplerose - You’re a pervert when you stay underwater in a pool for hours even if you can’t swim just to look at the “different” view from below the water.
29. Cheyenne - Sila yung mga tuwang-tuwa kapag may baha kasi inaabangan nila yung mga estudyante na naglililis ng kanilang uniform para hindi ito mabasa!
30. Marcus - Sarili mong asawa china-chansingan mo in public.
31. Your Highness - One sure sign that you’re a pervert is pag laging malagkit ang pusod mo!
32. Glioblastoma - When you always have thoughts of having sex inside a balikbayan box.
33. Black Coffee - I’m a pervert because whenever I spot a hot sexy girl, sumisikip ang pantalon ko.
34. No name - You are a pervert if you have a copy of one of the following not-so-wholesome animated movies: “Snow White Does the Seven Dwarves”, “Beauty Digs the Beast”, and the all-time favorite, “The Loin King”.
35. M.E. - My husbnd saves a lot of those porn videos in his phone. I get angry when his phone memory is low because of this. But when he’s asleep, I secretly take a peek at the videos.
36. KiD BuKid - If you always fake having sore eyes, so you’ll get away with getting immediate “medication” from the lactating young Moms!
37. Diemyrus - If you’re happy when you’re packed like sardines in the MRT.
38. No name - Kapag binobosohan mo ang sarili mo.
39. ACER - Back in college, we deliberately wear basketball shorts when in a jeepney, and sit a certain way so that when girls in short shorts get on, our knees rub their legs.
40. Jose de vengenge - When on a date, ang paalam mo pag iihi ka: “Excuse me, I have to shake hands with a friend of mine who hopes to meet you after dinner..”
Labels: You've been jacked
